Thoughts of writing an original work for the first time

 

Since my last visit to the National Museum Singapore, I professed wanting to write a story inspired by Singaporean history. I got to work today.

On the way home, as I walked to the appropriate train platform, I kept thinking, 'wouldn't it be nice to write a book'? To have something full and substantial with my creativity? Not that writing fan fiction is inherently wrong or uncreative, but maybe I should tell my own stories with my own characters and ideas steeped into the narrative from start to finish.

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I never understood the fear of a blank page when it came to writing.

Before I start every fan fiction project, regardless of whether it gets finished, regardless of length, I will always have a scene or two that begs to be written. From there, everything else coagulates. I go to sleep and I dream of something that I scramble to write and remember the following morning. I take a walk, and a dialogue just hit me, as if it's meant to be from the beginning. Ideas flow better if I have the right song playing for atmosphere. 

Sometimes, yes, I'll need to make things up. Those made-up sections always flow awkwardly since they lack the spontaneous freshness that comes from a shower thought. For the parts that have that, though, I'll still need to fill in the gaps, context, lead up, and conclusions that don't come with the fun parts in every vision I have. I think of that as applying fresh cement to hide the cracks, make the original block brand new.

Here, though I'm truly with a blank page, armed with nothing more than a vague aesthetic, two names of characters I don't know and have yet to call my own and the itch to create and make this story real somehow, that if I do not try, I will feel guilty.

I get over the inertia to write one sentence, "It's unusually rainy at this time of year in the Trees." It isn't a good starter. Not very impactful and doesn't tell you the plot. I read somewhere that the first sentence of any project is the DNA of the story, one that tells you up front what the emotional texture will be and a vague indication of the plot. I didn't get that here, but I needed something.

From there, an exposition wrote itself. Not a good one. I typically dislike rambly text dumps, both as a reader and writer, but a rambly text dump is a more suitable foundation than a blank page. I press on, and now my character Thomas is in love with a woman who's the mother of an original character I designed years ago. At least now, I know what Thomas looks like. He has black hair and blue eyes. He is a reserved man. He is a politician.

Most importantly, I realise somewhat stupidly that this will not be a novel. I do not have the patience. I don't even know what happens to them. Yet, the more I write, the more I imbue these people with a personality and backstory that has a unique depth that I never give to fan fiction. It's demanding, but if it works, I'll have something with substance, something that matters.

Perhaps this project will exist as a short story, or not at all. Yet, the forty minutes spent giving light to this world have convinced me ever more that this is real. It can finally take shape outside of my head in the form of ill-defined images peppered here and there. I feel creative, like I'm finally giving my time and skills a purpose I've never felt before. It is invigorating.